We are who we are and we are where we are because….

In a previous blogI started by saying humans are a funny bunch and not in a funny ha, ha kind of way! We are who we are sounds a bit ‘resignist,’ almost a fait accompli, as if there is no way out of it and we are who we are because…..well for lots of reasons.

For the very reason (or reasons) that we are who we are and we are where we are also gives us hope, because we have the ability to think, the greatest capacity of any species on Earth, and the thought patterns that have got us to this point can also bring us in different directions. It often feels like we are heading mindlessly into oblivion – cataclysmic climate oblivion - the fact that there are people on this planet that have worked that we are on that course already means we also have the capacity to fix things. Therefore, there remains hope and possibility.

Humans for the most part are largely predictable. They of course spring surprises and can be entirely unpredictable but of course surprises and unpredictability have always been features of humanity and thus it’s a little illogical to think of them as anything other than normal, at least in real terms.

We for example can recall hearing horrible stories of seemingly placid men who kill their wives and children without any reason, yet we know that one of the reasons if indeed, not the primary reason that men become violent is the inability to deal with shame and embarrassment. How many times have we heard that ‘she was about to leave him and take the kids with her.’ For many men the shame that this brings is too much to bear and so they resort to murder.

How often do we hear about people taking their lives out of the blue without (seemingly) any reason but because they felt there was no other option open to them, or they didn’t want to talk or couldn’t talk for that matter, they have very regrettably chosen to take their own life instead. If only they knew how to talk or felt confident to ‘open up’ to someone.

As we uncover more and more about humanity and make new discoveries about how we function as a species, we continue to persist (ironically) with old ways of thinking and thus are destined (all too often) to make the same mistakes. We have for example, an education system created in the 19th century but still operating in the same way in the 21st century. We tinker with it rather than introduce radical wholesale changes needed.

We continue to produce a conveyor belt of young people who can recite poetry, calculate square routes, explain gravity and tell you the difference between a mountain and a hill. Equally, and in an age when a much wider skill set is required we have many unable to turn on a washing machine, understand the emotions they’re feeling, manage conflict with their friends and peers and incapable of making healthy, well-informed decisions without drawing the curtains and refusing to leave their room!

There is so much evidence of superior education systems, particularly in Scandinavian countries, but the one that stand outs and held up as the best on the planet is Finland. With a focus on play until the age of seven, shorter days in school, a much more democratic classroom, and no homework, these are just some of the measures that have produced much more rounded individuals better able to deal with stresses and trials of everyday life, yet are no less educated academically speaking but are much more rounded individuals.

We are who we are and we are where we are because we are afraid to change, reluctant to change (as that might mean having to admit defeat as it were) or refuse to change (on a point of principle). We are who we are and we are where we are because we are employ values like, ‘well it didn’t do me any harm so it won’t do you any harm’ as if to balance up the punishment stakes, i.e., ‘I had to go through so you should suffer too.’

We are who we are and we are where we are because no-one is prepared to sacrifice or take a hit so ‘I won’t.’ We are who we are and we are where we are because the elites have a sense of entitlement, our values are tied up with our emotions and form part of our identity and we’re not prepared to forsake values inherited from parents (among others), values we have fought hard to maintain.

We are who we are and we are where we are because we don’t know how to be wrong, it actually does matter to us how we are viewed by others and because we place value on competition as the way to get by and that allows us to ‘stand out’ and be noticed.

We are who we are and we are where we are because we have been led to be believe that we are naturally competitive as opposed to co-operative, because status is the only way to make inroads and change things and because knowledge is more important than play, creativity, or imagination.

We are who we are and we are where we are because, because, because!

As you can see, we are who we are and we are where we are for lots of reasons, hundreds, perhaps thousands, more. I think one of the key reasons that is that in Western Culture, we are encouraged not to think but to consume – parents, teachers, employers – all ‘teach us’ how to consume rather than create.

They all form part of a common narrative, one in which once we find our place by learning our place, consuming all the information they give us, so that we can in turn pass this onto the next generation.

That place is somewhere on the conveyor belt of life that ensures we are in a cycle of perpetual growth that feeds into ‘the bigger picture’ that keeps the state turning over without much consideration for those outside of ‘Western Culture.’

We are who we are and we are where we are until we begin to rethink who we are and not so much where we want to go but rather where we want to end up and the means by which we choose to get there.